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Friday, August 04, 2006

FRUITS BASKET VOL. 5 TRANSLATION NOTES

As I have time and energy, I'll be going back and doing translation notes for those volumes of Fruits Basket that I skipped or only did cursory notes for, starting here with vol. 5. As usual, TP stands for Tokyopop's text, JP stands for the Japanese text, and my own translation follows. Page numbers refer to Tokyopop's edition; to get the Japanese page numbers, subtract four.

p. 23, panel 4: TP: "Please, Mitchan...don't do anything drastic!!"
JP: "Dakara toriaezu Mitchan shinu na!!"
"So first of all, Mitchan, don't die!!"

p. 32, panel 2: Where in TP Kyou says "little boys," in JP he says "obotchan." While TP's translation isn't wrong, "obotchan" also has the connotation of "young master," or of a sheltered child. In effect, Kyou is accusing Yuki of being a spoiled rich kid. Of course this is ironic, given what we later learn about Yuki's childhood, just as the second half of Kyou's accusation in this panel is.

p. 51, panel 1: TP: "He's insane!!"
JP: "Koitsu...!!"
"This guy...!!"

p. 59, panel 4: TP: "Kana's memories aren't buried very deep."
JP: "Kana ni wa kasane ga ke o hodokoshite inai"
Frankly, I don't know what the Japanese means here. "Kasane" means "pile" or "heap"; "ke" here probably means "indications," "a trace," or "a suspicion"; and "hodokusu" means "give." Put them all together, and you get "With Kasane, a pile doesn't give an indication." Perhaps this means something like "with Kasane, there's a lot that's hidden under the surface," but that's just a guess. (I own a Japanese-English idiom dictionary, but it's of no help here.) Normally, when I'm stumped as to what the JP means, I don't mention it in these notes, since the translators may know something I don't. But in this case, I recently saw someone refer to this while discussing a later scene, so I thought I'd provide the information for whoever can use it.

p. 59, panel 4: TP: "it would be...problematic."
JP: "komaru darou"
TP's translation is possible, but given the context and Hatori's character, "it would be distressing" would be a better translation.

p. 60, panel 3: TP: "The feelings of guilt and shame won't disappear. They'd spread like a cancer[,] eating away at the light and the joy that Kana once brought me."
JP: "Oime ya hikeme wa kienai shimi no you ni hirogatte Kana no kokoro o tsukaresaseru dake"
"Like a stain (or shame) that won't disappear, debt and weakness will spread and only make Kana's heart weary." Again, the Japanese isn't too clear, but it doesn't seem to mean what TP has it mean. If you read Japanese, you'll notice that I've chosen to punctuate this passage differently than TP did. TP treats the first five words of this passage as a separate sentence, thus making "kienai" (won't disappear) refer to "oime ya hikeme" rather than "shimi". If I were to follow TP's punctuation, my translation would read: "Debt and weakness won't disappear. Like a stain, they'll spread and only make Kana's heart weary." Because Takaya (or whoever does the lettering) rarely inserts periods, I can't tell for sure who's right.

p. 63, panel 3: TP: "I want you to be two thousand times happier than you would be with Kana-kun!"
JP: "Tori-san ni wa Kana-kun yori mo nisenbai chikaku shiawase ippai ni natte moraitai no da yo!"
"I want you to be filled with about two thousand times more happiness than Kana-kun!"

p. 65, panels 4 and 5: TP: "For us, the cursed members of the zodiac[,] when I think of the pain we can cause someone we love I feel that the memories of my time with Kana are enough. I think I can get by without anyone else."
JP: "Norowareta oretachi ni totte wa...sou kangaeru to sukoshi demo Kana to iu sonzai ga ita ore wa mou juubun nan' ja nai darou ka. Ore wa mou kore de ii n' ja nai darou ka"
"For us who are cursed...when I think of it that way, that Kana existed even for a little is already enough for me. It's fine for me as it is." Again, the Japanese isn't easy to understand, but what TP added is definitely not there. I did the best I could to produce something that stays reasonably close to the Japanese and isn't too awkward-sounding. ("Ja nai ka," with which Hatori ends both of his sentences, literally means "isn't that so?" Here it means something like "you know". In English it sounds unnatural here, so I left it out of my translation.)

p. 82, panel 1: TP: "Teasing."
JP: "Ijime"
"Bullying." "Teasing" would be a possible translation in isolation, but it's too weak a word for what happened to Kisa. "Bullying," which is the usual translation, is preferable here. And the same applies for TP's references to "teasing" in subsequent pages.

p. 82, panel 3: Just to point out, Tohru here isn't laughing, but trying to say "Hatsuharu." Incidentally it just occurred to me: it's odd that Kisa is so timid as a human, but as a tiger she keeps biting people. None of the other juunishi undergo a personality change when they transform, as far as we know.

p. 84, panel 3: There's no question mark in the JP.

p. 86, panel 2: TP: "Shut up!"
JP: "Yamero yo..."
"Stop it..." The meaning is the same, but the tone is different.

p. 93, panel 3: TP: "I would desperately make up stories"
JP: "Hisshi ni kyosei o hatte"
"I would desperately put up a bold front"

p. 98, panel 3: In the JP, Haru uses the word "rihabiri" (derived from the English "rehabilitation") for "recuperation." Presumably this is an uncommon word, which would explain Kyou's remark in the next panel.

p. 100, panel 2: TP: "Please let me watch her..."
JP: "Kou sasete..."
"Let me stay like this..." It seems clear to me that by "like this," Yuki means resting his
head on Tohru's shoulder, not watching Kisa.

p. 111, panel 4: TP: "is doing better."
JP: "daijoubu desu yo"
"is all right" (or "is fine")

p. 112, panel 6: TP: "On the outside, he doesn't care about the main reason."
JP: "Gaiteki youin wa dou demo ii hito"
"A person who doesn't care about the external cause"

p. 123, panel 3: There's nothing in the JP about "You can begin to face your fears..."

p. 126, panels 1 and 4: TP: "Someday I'll have to stand up for my worthless self." "...is where she is."
JP: "Itsuka wa dame na jibun ni tachimukatte ikanakute wa kanojo ga ite kureru"
"When, someday, I have to confront the no-good me, she'll be here for me." The "-te wa" construction here, meaning "if" or "when", is one I'd never encountered or read about before, and had me puzzled for a while. (Finally the Reference Grammar of Japanese I overspent on is of some use!)

p. 127, panel 3: TP: "You finally spoke."
JP: "Yatto koe kiketa..."
"I could finally hear your voice..." The meaning is the same, but the tone is different. Incidentally, the question mark following "Let's try our best" in this panel (or the next panel, depending upon how you look at it) isn't an error: it's there in the Japanese too.

p. 136, panel 2: TP: "Were they trying to stick you with the blame for something?"
JP: "Nankuse tsukerareta ka?"
"Were they criticizing you?"

p. 155, panel 4: TP: "What makes her think Yuki-kun wants to be around her?"
JP: "Yuki-kun no nani ga wakaru tte no sa"
"What does she know about Yuki-kun?"

p. 155, panel 5 and p. 156, panel 1:
TP: "...merely for her association with something like Yuki..."
"'Something like'...?! You would dare call the prince a 'thing'?!"
JP: "...Sohma Yuki gotoki no sei de"
"'Gotoki'...'Gotoki' toka iiyagarimasu ka..."
[My translation]: "...on account of someone like Sohma Yuki"
"'Someone like'..."Did you say 'someone like'?..."
"Gotoki" means "like," "such as." In the books I looked at, I didn"t see any indication that it can only apply to things, or that it has connotations of thingness.Hanajima may be being a bit contemptuous of Yuki here, but not nearly as much as the TP makes her. (The verb Motoko uses has a suffix that implies contempt, but I couldn't figure out how to reflect that in my translation without adding stuff not in the JP.)

p. 157, panel 1: TP: "you cannot say whatever comes into your head and assume you will be forgiven"
JP: "nani o itte mo yurusareru nante omotte wa ikenai..."
"don't think you are allowed to say whatever you want..." Though I usually see "yurusu" used to mean "forgive" in anime and manga (as in the ubiquitous "I won't/can't forgive you/her/him!"), in fact "permit, allow, approve" is the first definition given in my Japanese-English dictionary.

p. 157, panel 2: TP: "If you like him, how can you speak about him so disrespectfully? You should choose your words more thoughtfully."
JP: "'Suki' nara nani o shite mo yurusareru nante omotte iru nara hansei shita hou ga ii..."
"If you think that because you 'love' him you are allowed to do whatever you want, you should reconsider..."

p. 166, panel 1: TP: "Where does your happiness come from?"
JP: "Genki no minamoto wa nan' desu ka?"
"What is the source of vitality (or energy)?"

p. 176, panel 4: There's nothing in the JP about "We'll take care of everything else."

p. 186, panel 1: TP: "It's not cool making yourself sick from worrying."
JP: "Omae sonna kaze hiite warui to omotte n' nara patto naoshite"
"If you feel bad about catching a cold like this, get better quickly"

p. 194, panel 1: TP: "My happiness comes from the kindness of everyone around me."
JP: "Watashi no genki no minamoto wa itsumo minasan ga ataete kureru no desu"
"The source of my energy is that everyone always gives it to me"

Comments:
Back from my trip, so I finally got a chance to read this. ^_^ Very cool and helpful, as usual.

(And thanks for the link back in your previous post. ^^)
 
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